the comfort of being underwhelmed

“The only thing I cannot resist is temptation.” ~ Oscar Wilde

There is no real need to be passionate, inspired, compelled or feeling like your heart is on fire, for it will indeed pass if you ignore it long enough. You can rest comfortably knowing that you didn’t take risks, never pushed your limits, shied away from expressing your love and followed the same path when you reached the fork in the road. The meaning of life and your part in it is never simply taught or easily accepted, it is learned as we live our lives, as we test our skills and is it no where written in stone for us all to carry around in our pockets as a reminder.

“Listen to the mustn’ts, child. Listen to the don’ts. Listen to the shouldn’ts, the impossibles, the won’ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me… Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.” ~ Shel Silverstein

Life flows and changes, sometimes in an instant and you catch yourself wondering why it can feel just a little bit overwhelming in the blink of an eye. Fear not my friends for help is on the way, very soon you will be able to stand with all the others who share your quest for mediocrity, as more and more tools, handouts and freebies are being assembled for your enjoyment.

It was one of those terrifying moments when I had inadvertently entertained a passion to think differently for myself and before I knew it, I was driven to switch from the dark side. I had started meeting new people in person, making new friends with like inspirations and I had in a weak, yet inspired moment openly expressed my adoration for someone who I suddenly knew had the potential to be the love of my life. I was flying into the stratosphere of of existence and the either was far more fun to breathe than the air found near the examples of simple and safe existence.

“I was surprised, as always, be how easy the act of leaving was, and how good it felt. The world was suddenly rich with possibility.” ~ Jack Kerouac

I was literally scared senseless for those few weeks and months, though I enjoyed a new feeling of freedom and inspiration, I quickly came to my senses and realized that this was very thin ice I was walking on. What if I continued creating unique ideas, thoughts and feelings of warmth associated with a deep love for myself, an acceptance of the endless capabilities swelling up from deep inside? Should I walk away or start running now before it was far to late to turn back?

What was I thinking, it was far better to sit back and enjoy the slow, consistent ride of being underwhelmed. I do not like tests, challenges or opportunities to make a difference, I was to merely exist, after all, if it ain’t broken, why bother fixing it? One of my biggest concerns was dashed while hovering around rock bottom for a while, mediocrity was there too and I felt no desire to become buddies.

“Temptation is not to be feared, but controlled.” Deborah Brodie

How fortunate was I to have felt for those brief moments that I was indeed a creative source of something better and why was I so intrigued by what might appear just around the bend. It was the unknown and there was a intuitive knowing that what was to present itself I would enjoy greatly and I all at once knew that I was a fool to let yet another opportunity pass me by.

“It’s a hard life sometimes and the biggest temptation is to let how hard it is be an excuse to weaken” ~ Walter Dean Myers

Beware of the temptation to write, to dance, to love, to lust after, to sing or to skip down the street without a care for these will all inspire your thinking and instill the notion that life truly has so much more to offer those who actually give it a try. My favorite distractions from the bliss of under performance is the happiness felt when helping someone for no reason, assisting someone saddened by their circumstances to smile for the first time in days and days, or to meet someone who holds the key to an openness of your wildest dreams and thank them with repeated hugs.

All these persistant annoyances, yet with a different view, more clarity of the options and those pesky “endless possibilities”, the process overtakes and envelopes us in desires to achieve, to experience, to feel and to expect more from ourselves.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you…

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8 thoughts on “the comfort of being underwhelmed

    1. Oh, you felt that nudge? And I thought I was better at hiding those kick in the pants recommendations – I’ll keep working on that. Thanks for your comments and appreciation of our need to kick up our heels more often. Edw.

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