I am connecting to a higher self, or at the very least I am more open to this new connection within the deeper me, the real me, the inspired me – mentally, physically and spiritually. The beginning of this new appreciation of all that can be, began with a move from my home town and away from what I had always felt was simply my destiny.
“Presume not that I am the thing I was.” ~ William Shakespeare
When you are born and raised in one of the most beautiful places in the world, I had begun to wonder if I was indeed seeing things through rose-colored glasses only. What of my world was missing, what had I restricted myself from living, learning and growing as a man by staying within a 20 mile radius of my birth.
What had begun as simply a fresh start and a desire to be closer to my kids was now feeling more like a journey and a mystical journey at that. A new home, many new and wonderful friends, a new and improved view of humanity and most importantly a new and better acceptance of any and all possibilities.
I was now more open to the permission in and of life and love, which by the way I was soon to realize was not a chance evolution, but much more a recognition of and inspiration for change. I had opened my senses and with it my heart to the beauty of my own potential, the limits were being lifted as a result of my new love for life.
Everything I could ever want was there for the taking I had thought, and though things had slowed to a near stand still via the movements of life at that time, I had become more than just a little immune to what can and will be. I had lost my spark, I had followed in the same footsteps for far too long and I had all of a sudden realized that there was something powerful calling me to explore. I had forgotten how much fun it was to not reach a goal, but to strive to attain it.
“Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.” ~ Andy Rooney
In my new world, I was drawn by more opportunity, not of a career path or monetary success I had convinced myself would be my salvation, it was more an opening of the potential in people, of relationships, of learning new things, and a rekindling of desire. Special circumstances and the willingness to step out of what was clearly my comfort zone, had indeed allowed for a new and better connection with myself.
Soon after arriving in my new “temporary” hamlet, I began changing things about myself that I had been wanting to change for quite a while. The first of these being diet and exercise, a new mindset perhaps, but what I was now embracing was a new lifestyle and a new understanding of my care and feeding of my temple. I eliminated certain foods, I cooked more at home and went out less for quick meals and I made it a point to break a sweat more often.
Then there was a break in the flow of this new happiness, as something took hold of my progress and which I now see as a chance to step back. What I had discovered quite joyfully is that my new lifestyle and personal care mantra had garnered new and quite impressive results. I was alarmed by how none of my clothes fit, I had willingly adapted to new ways of thinking and this translated into a loss of over 30 pounds and nearly four inches in my waist.
“All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous unpremeditated act without the benefit of experience.” ~ Henry Miller
The energy level changes alone were quite impressive and though I was now getting used to new sleep patterns, I was also connecting to a new and much improved inner self. Old patterns and habits changed daily, I had little or no desire to watch TV, I was reading everyday, I was watching broadcasts and listening to audios by exerts and other inspired souls and it was changing the way I think and feel. It was truly a snow ball effect and I was ever so excited about the progress in life, it was addicting to say the least.
Then it happened, there was a lull, a half time, a skip in the new beat, a doldrum and hence I am writing today to express my concern. What at first I saw as a simple hiccup in the beat of new advancement, was in actuality an opportunity to step back and appreciate what had occurred. What had been a steam roller pace of improvement and delight in so many new feelings and thoughts, afforded me a reminder that I should never give up, give in or pace myself again.
What had slapped me up the side of the head was in reality, positive and unbridled change and I simply needed to be more aware of the how and why. The new feeling of moving forward thanks to many new activities and special new friends had me understanding more the bliss of a newer, better and more in depth acceptance of life.
“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” ~ Anais Nin
I was standing in the dark of an early morning rain storm, understanding more of myself than ever before, so I took a deep breath, smiled a wide and wonderful smile and enjoyed a laugh at myself while I simply sang out loud – Dang!