Sometimes you just have to break out of your frumpy state of adulthood and take a new and better look at life. Be more gracious and pursue every available opportunity to have fun, laugh at your circumstances while you do the right thing for your family.
Having spent a wonderful afternoon with my fabulous teenaged children recently, I was reminded that the decision of always putting them first has been the very best agreement I could have made.
If you put your children’s interests first and foremost in everything you think, do and say – your insignificant life battles will be decided for you, they will not matter as much as your children’s happiness – so step up and do the right thing!
To remain close to my family and stay involved with their activities, their higher education, to be in-tune with their dreams and to connect with their passions. Their willingness to share this sensitive information with you and anything else that might be bothering them should be your primary goal.
These fabulous experiences of having even a few moments together and laughing at just about everything; at this time of my life, is at the heart of my happiness.
Through the years the only distance between us has been geographical and the connection as a family has never waned, become uncomfortable or tarnished by thoughts and feelings unspoken.
If you were to guess why I have been blessed with compassionate parenting involving their love and acceptance, it may be quite clear and simple – I have been and always will be honest and forthright with them.
They were thrown into the drama of a divorce and had to deal with all of the pain and frustration based on the choices and decisions of their parents. They were forced to grow up too fast and deal with a disconnected reality of living and thriving in two different homes.
They are young adults now and thankfully this stage of life has little effect on our ability to remain connected, to laugh and have a wonderful time expressing that we are indeed from the same pool of genes. There are similarities in our appearance, but what is more important and more obvious to the outside observer – we communicate openly, share willingly and any life lessons and challenges are shared and discussed honestly.
I have been struggling a bit this past few year and only recently have been offered an opportunity some 1,000 miles away and this phenomenon has inspired many discussions offering their immediate support, understanding and sincere best wishes in my finding a worthwhile and enjoyable life direction.
As I was driving home alone, I enjoyed a calm associated with my awareness that I needn’t worry about them too much. Any and all advice, life experience and our constant communication as a dynamic unit was paying off as I smiled widely as only a proud father can. A level of comfort in our children’s ability to handle their advancement as young adults, is like no other feeling.
One of the most important factors in successful parenting for me is to always maintain a clear vision of their success and happiness. They may not need you to support them in as many ways as you wish you could. Many if not all of their decisions moving forward will depend on their experiences and lessons learned due to being part of a family. Their trust in your honesty and your desire to do what is right in their lives will provide serenity in your quest to be a great father or mother.
Their knowing that they are loved and respected will offer contentment in knowing that your efforts will indeed pay off . You have your own life to live that will may grow apart by mere miles as we choose and follow our own path, having your children retain and cherish communication because they honor that connection will be wondrous.
“When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching — they are your family. “ ~ Jim Butcher
As we progress with our intention to retain the connection with our families, hopefully we will achieve a level of happiness that we have never before experienced or enjoyed. They are our greatest gifts, respect their individuality, their freedom and only offer to them the very best you can be.